A man comes to the gates of heaven. The guard sees that he is wearing a white shirt, has long payos and a beard. "You look like you belong here," he says, "tell me a vort and I'll let you in." So, the man tells him a nice d'var torah and is let in.
Next, a guy walks up with a tweed jacket, brown shoes, blue shirt, and gray straw hat.
"Are you sure you have the right place?" says the guard.
"Yep, I was told to come here," replies the man.
"All right, tell me a vort and I'll let you in." says the guard.
The man replies, "How about you tell me a vort, and I'll shlug you up"